Have you seen one of those T-shirts that say “it’s not how you play the game that counts, but how you look while you’re playing the game.” Well at least they got part of it right. How you look does influence the majority of people’s interpretation of you. We have about 30 seconds to make a first impression, and that first impression (positive or negative) is generally lasting. And this is gracious-many experts say that first impressions are made within the first 10 seconds.
But, it takes more than looking good if you want to be truly effective in business. We all know the people who absolutely look great. Well groomed; well dressed. And that’s it; that’s all they’ve got. “They” are pejoratively referred to as the “empty suit”. Executive presence is more than the Armani suite, the Chanel leather portfolio, the Rolex watch. We believe that it’s about being the part. It’s about your knowledge and skills, AND your self-confidence, self-esteem aka a positive self-image.
Executive presence is about preparing you, and yes, taking care of yourself. People with low self-esteem (and this is an issue for some regardless of the position they hold) and a low self-image, often neglect their health and their appearance. We are not talking about looking like the models in GQ or Vogue; we are talking about having a suitable and appropriate self-respect.
Like it or not (yes, we know this is a very sensitive area, but we are committed to candidness and performance support) tired, overweight, out of shape and sloppy people present a very different image than people who take care of themselves. And please don’t kill the messenger.
We are also talking about preparing and growing yourself. What you read, who you listen to, what you watch on television contributes to who you are as a person. In a previous blog we talked about the importance of building real relationships. Building relationships is dependent in part on finding common ground, areas of mutual interest. Involved, informed people like to know they are talking to involved, informed people – not just a phantasma wrapped up in a nice suite.
So, if this resonates with you, here are key points for you to consider:
- Unplug - the more you are on your iphone or blackberry, the less
available you are to those around you. You are missing opportunities!
- Look at and connect with those around you - be willing to smile at
others, look them in the eyes and hear what they have to say
- Match your dress to the client situation
- Read – be familiar with current events, best sellers and community events relevant to the client
- Use intelligent words; sound intelligent (and be prepared to discuss your reasoning and opinion if asked!)
- Take care of yourself – get adequate sleep, exercise, and practice good nutrition
- Speak confidently and don’t end sentences as if you are asking a question – unless of course, you are asking a question
- Be aware of annoying and distracting habits – if you are uncertain what yours are – have someone you know and trust point them out to you
- Ask provocative questions
- Carry yourself with confidence and as if you care about what you are doing – PS-we believe you do, so show it!
- Get help if you feel you are not presenting well – a performance coach or image consultant can do wonders for you
- Act like a peer regardless of whom you are talking to
- Be interested more than interesting. You don’t have to be an amazing conversationalist to talk with others and form new relationships – you just have to be interested in them, and you do this by asking meaningful questions and then acknowledging that you’re hearing and understanding them. For example, “that’s very interesting, would you tell me more about that”
- Be highly conscious of your personal presentation. We strongly believe that when you look good, you feel better about yourself, and when you feel better about yourselves, you will exude more confidence. When you are more confident, it seems easier to extend to others.
Copyright 2009 Kubica and LaForest
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